The Best Birthday Gift Ever

I went out to lunch today with Cara, Beth, and Hubby.  It was sort of a birthday lunch and Cara told me she was bringing a gift. That was enough to get me excited; I love birthday gifts! But this was especially exciting because I know that Cara makes her gifts by hand, so whatever it is, it's always special and one of a kind.

Hubby and I were there first, but Cara and Beth arrived soon thereafter. After the greetings and pleasantries, Cara handed me a beautifully gift wrapped box which I promptly unwrapped by ripping the paper off it very much in the way I like to rip the clothes off a man just before we...you know.

When I opened the box, I saw a set of kitchen towels that Cara had personalized for me by sewing on some special appliques. They were very cute Dick & Jane towels. I loved them!

My first thought was, "How cute! And how perfect!"  I was thinking of the fact that I was a teacher at one point in my life and that I am actually old enough to have learned to read using the Dick and Jane books.

Then I looked closer and thought, "Oh my gosh! These really are perfect for me!"

But that thought was followed immediately by, "OH MY GOD!!! Hubby is here!  Why did she give me these in front of Hubby???"

Take a closer look:

The first one says, "Come and play, See Dick."



The second one says, "Come, Sally, come! Oh, Dick."

The final one says, "See Dick and Jane go up and down."

So there I was holding these towels, almost speechless, wanting to comment about the obvious message communicated by the text but knowing that this could be really weird. I chose to go with my default response, which is to act like nothing is out of the ordinary.

I thanked her profusely.  I talked about how much I loved them (which is 100% true). I showed them - very briefly - to Hubby, and then I put them back in the box while the conversation continued to how Hubby and I had both learned to read with the Dick and Jane books and how old that makes us. Then we moved on to talking about something else.

Hubby gave no indication that anything was unusual about the gift, but now I have another dilemma.  If I take them home to use them, he will clearly figure it out when he looks at them closely. If I don't take them home, he'll definitely think something is up. For now, they are resting quietly on my desk waiting for me to figure out what to do with them.

But I really love them! They are perfect for me....and so fun! Cara definitely knows me well.

I really do love Dick.

Another Night Out for the PWK Team

Every once in a while, Dauntless, Cara, Beth and I like to go out for an evening of fun.  I am speaking of fun in the old fashioned sense - food, drink, laughter, and so on. No sex, but the conversation is a bit spicier than you might hear around a typical mixed-gender group of friends.

For example, last night we talked about what percentage of the male population is circumcised, and what percentage of the men I've been with were circumcised. Cara said that Mexican men typically aren't circumcised, which just sounded wrong to me because I've enjoyed more than my share of Mexican men (as well as South American men) and that wasn't my experience, but who would argue with sweet Cara about such a thing?

We talked about Adam and the size of his gorgeous enormous cock, and that brought us around to discussing the penis size of men of different ethnicities and if ethnicity really is a factor in size.

By the way, during the cock discussion, Daunt sat there holding onto his beer like it was a life preserver.  Every time I'd ask, "What do you think, Daunt?" he'd snap out of his "how-long-can-I-pretend-that-this-discussion-isn't-happening" stupor and shrug his shoulders.

We passed around a hot Halloween picture of Daunt's brother, BruceD (in the pic to the right), and three of us (can you guess which three?) drooled and admired, and one or two of us may have made inappropriate comments about what we might like to do with such a lovely gentleman if given the opportunity (but I can't really remember....LOL).

The photo reminded me of that episode of Nip/Tuck where Christian Troy was having sex with that ugly gal who had a hot body and he made her put a bag over her face.  Not that BruceD is ugly...absolutely not!  But the mask made me think, "Heck, I don't care if he leaves the mask on.  It's not his face that's getting me wet right now anyway."  But I digress.....

The last time we had a PWK Night Out we went out to eat.  This time, we decided to do something a little more active.

Shame on you for those naughty thoughts!

I'm talking about bowling, of course!

Because I like to make everything a little more interesting, I suggested a little wager. We agreed that whoever came in dead last of the four of us would have to provide the HNT photo for this week.  This idea came up because Cara said she's boycotting HNT because there were no comments on last week's one and few comments on the few before that.  So, we looked at Beth.  No way.  Daunt?  He has a gift for taking a swig of beer while vigorously shaking his head no. As for me, we all know I have an inferiority complex about being compared to Cara.  There was only one civilized way to settle it  - assign the HNT task to the worst bowler.

We all swaggered confidently to the counter to sign up for a lane and rent those ugly and disgusting shoes.

About the shoes....First, I am convinced that they make them so ugly so no one would even consider stealing them. Second, there is something very creepy about wearing the same pair of shoes that hundreds of other people have worn before.  It's a level of intimacy with perfect strangers that just isn't for me.  Of course, I can write about the details of my sexual encounters and share them with thousands of strangers, but that's completely different. Third, as ugly and as creepy as the shoes are, they give you a sense of belonging when you wear them. After I put mine on, I walked proudly to pick a ball, suddenly feeling like I was part of something greater than myself.  I was part of the great unwashed bowling masses.  And I was proud.

Oh,  I learned something I didn't know last night - that Cara has a strict sense of justice about shoe rules in a bowling alley.  We noticed several people at lanes around us who were not wearing the required ugly shoes. Who did those people think they were? Didn't they understand that wearing the ugly shoes was part of the bowler bonding experience?  If anyone opted out (which was against the rules), it made the rest of us just look like idiots wearing ugly shoes.  The magic of the bowling shoe experience requires that everyone participate. I was able to let it go because I needed to focus on not being last, but Cara couldn't let it go. She kept talking about it.  Then she walked by a few lanes giving the evil eye to the non-conformists. The she went up to the counter and reported them!  But that wasn't the worst part.  The worst part was that nothing happened.  Nothing changed. I chalked it up as a metaphor for the injustice in modern society.  Cara just got mad and focused her rage toward the pins.  That was not good for the rest of us.

Since we shared a photo of our hands from a previous night out, I thought it would be fun this time to share a different kind of photo. The photo on the left includes me, Daunt, and Cara (not in that order). See what I mean about the shoes?


We bowled three games and agreed that we would add the scores from all three games to determine the overall winner, and the loser who would be our HNT guy or gal for the week.

We were having a great time, but it wasn't going well for me.

During the third game, as depression was setting in, I got a text from JJ. After an explanation of where I was and what was going on:

Kat: I suck at bowling.

JJ: You can suck my balls anytime, Baby.

JJ always knows how to help me put things into perspective.

Here are the final rankings:

First place - Cara
Second Place - DauntlessD
Third Place - Beth
Loser - Kat

Uuuggghhhhhh. I'd skip HNT this week, but I think Cara would come after me if I did.

My favorite parts of the evening:

DauntlessD

1. Getting to gaze at Daunt's ass about 60 times when it was his turn without him knowing what I was doing.
2. Watching Cara go into Law and Order mode over the shoe criminals.
3. Stealing some glimpses of the hot guy bowling about 4 lanes away from us. I would have been all over that...except for his poor taste in shoes.
4. Watching Beth's eyes pop out over BruceD's photo. I love knowing I'm not the only woman who objectifies men.
5. Spending several hours with great friends.

I'm already looking forward to our next PWK Night Out.

Beth

JJ, Kat, Cara, Beth....and Peanut Butter

JJ has now become the first of our prowling friends to meet the whole Prowling with Kat crew in person. He met DauntlessD a couple of days ago, and he met Cara last night. Of course, he's known me for awhile (yes, in the biblical sense). For some reason, introducing JJ to my good friends Cara and Dauntless felt a lot like taking him home to meet mom and dad, in spite of the fact that Cara does not look anything like my mother and Dauntless is not my dad (even though I did purr when he said, "Who's your Daddy?" early in our relationship). It meant something to me for them to meet him and give their approval. I'll let you guess what that means.

But I digress....

The evening started out as a girls night out. I met Cara and another friend, Beth, at a movie theater. Our plan was to see a movie and then go out to dinner to meet JJ.  Cara was gorgeous, as always. She wore a cute peasant blouse (just tight enough to show off her.... uh....features), a pair of tight, perfectly fitted jeans, and some very hot bright red, 5" pumps. She is definitely one of those women who turns heads as she walks into a room, any room, with her mix of "cute girl next door" face, beautiful long blond hair, and "OMG hot!" body.

Beth was cute as a button, too, but in more of a "I'm confident and look hot in jeans and tennis shoes" kind of way. I found myself staring at her pretty long brown hair several times, especially when she would play with it almost absentmindedly, pulling it back into a ponytail, then into another do later, then another. As we waited for the movie to start, I got to see some of Beth's tattoos, which fascinate me because I don't have any myself. We'll have to see if we can talk Beth into showing off some of her ink in an HNT one of these days.

There I go again, getting off track....

So, the movie was fun, and we went to dinner afterwards. Beth, Cara, and I were seated first, Beth next to me and Cara across from us with the empty chair next to her. I'll admit that I was a little disappointed and jealous because JJ would sit next to her and I'd have no opportunity to touch his leg or play footsie with him under the table. Oh well.... There was nothing to be done about it at that point. At least I would get to gaze at them both across the table, a pleasurable experience in itself.

JJ soon joined us and we got through that awkward first introductions phase and soon we were having a great time and laughing. Beth is just hilarious. She made me laugh so hard and so much that my cheeks hurt.  There were so many fun exchanges that it's hard to know which one to share with you, but I finally decided.

We were ordering dessert and decided on something involving a peanut butter cookie and vanilla ice cream. That's when we learned that Beth and I share a fondness for peanut butter (Who knew?):

Beth: I love peanut butter on anything, even straight out of the jar, but it looks strange if you don't put it on something...

Kat: Me, too!

Beth: Like celery...

Cara: Or a spoon...

Kat:  Or crackers...

Cara:  Or Kat's body...

(stunned silence, then laughter)

Kat: Mmm....you and I can discuss that later, Cara (wink)

JJ: On that note, I'll excuse myself for a bit. (Seriously, how is a man who doesn't want to draw attention to himself supposed to respond to that in a public place?)

(JJ steps away from the table)

Cara: (very concerned that she embarrassed him and made him uncomfortable) Kat, text him and let him know I wasn't talking about *him*. I was talking about *me* licking it off your body.

Kat: Oh, I think he got that. LOL.

JJ rejoined us shortly and we continued our fun and slightly naughty conversation while I stared at JJ, unable to take my eyes off him. Ok, ok, every now and then I stole a glance at Cara's perfect tits, but come on, who wouldn't???

The evening ended much too soon for my taste, but one thing is for sure: We will all be going out again. Maybe next time we'll talk Dauntless into joining us.