On Becoming a "Mature" Woman

A few days ago I corresponded with one of our readers. He emailed and we struck up an email conversation that eventually turned into a phone call.

We talked about lots of things, but one of the things that struck me was that, as we were talking about sexual exploration, he commented that it's not common for people my age to be so open about that sort of thing.

My age?

He's 31. I'm 47.

Don't misunderstand. He wasn't insulting me at all. He was helping me and providing some valuable insight for my business. Well, not when we were talking about sex, but that's where the conversation ended up - business.

It finally occurred to me that 31 year olds look at 47 year olds as "old." Yes, virtually 50. {sigh} And when I remember back to when I was 30-31, I did the same thing. I assumed that sex at 47 must be very sad , a poor reflection of the hot sex I was having at 30.

If I could go back and speak with 31 year old Kat about the matter, I would tell her that she has no idea how amazing sex in her mid-late 40's is going to be, and that the sex she's having in her early 30's is like spaghetti without sauce or nachos without jalapenos. Not bad, but nothing as tasty as it will be later.

At 47, I am much less inhibited than I was at 31 (and I wasn't very inhibited then). I have an appetite for new and different things, and I'm much less concerned about how I will perceived than I was 16 years ago. I have a true sense of who I am and what I want. At 31, I would have said that I did, but I had no idea how much more of me was yet to be discovered by me.

Without question, the best sex of my life has been in my 40's. I am certain that 20 or 30 year old Kat would never have believed it would be possible.

I remember my aunt telling me that a woman really comes into her own in her 40's and that the 40's may possibly be the most exciting time of a woman's life. At this stage of my life, I would agree with her, but I'm kind of interested in what the 50's will bring. Many of the limits that used to be placed on women have been pushed aside and our lives are, for the most part, more within our control.

The problem is that we tend to give that control away, or trade it away for security, safety, sometimes "love." If we can avoid giving it all away, incredible experiences await us.