My Little Slice of Heaven .....and Other Randomness

My "little slice of heaven." That's what I call my woohoo, and none of you guessed it! You came up with some fun guesses, though. My favorite was "Batter's Box," submitted by my buddy, Max. I wish I could reward Max with some time of his own in my Batter's Box, but he lives a few thousand miles away.  Such a shame. ;-)

I've been spending more time with Spartacus lately than I usually do. For those of you don't know, Spartacus is my favorite vibrator. He's quite loyal and always there for me, and he never disappoints.  It's never the same way twice with him, which is a concept that seems to elude Hubby.

So here I've been over the last month, hornier than I have been for a long time, and....well, nothing.  Almost nothing.  Hubby is....well.....he's who he is. JJ is busy. T is also unavailable, although we did have some very nice phone sex recently.  That was lovely. C is monitored more closely by his wife than are most inmates in a maximum security prison. D is on vacation. And SNS Guy remains two thousand miles away. What's a hungry Kat to do? I've attacked poor Hubby a couple of times out of pure frustration, but the lack of passion there really doesn't do much to quench my thirst, if you know what I mean.

So I just give Spartacus a new set of batteries and make do.  Hubby gave me some rechargeable batteries and a new charging station recently.  That helps.  Always thinking about saving money, dear Hubby.

I put lube on the family shopping list last week and Hubby asked what is was for. I answered, "If you don't know, then it has been waaaaaaaay too long......"

He continued to stare at me, so I said, "Spartacus is thirsty."

His eyes widened a bit with recognition and he replied with, "Oh. Ok. Is there any particular variety that Spartacus wants?"

"Spartacus likes what you like," I answered with a devilish smile.

"Oh." And that was the end of the conversation. {{{sigh}}}

On another topic......I'm in the process of writing a smutty romance novel. I've shared several chapters with a few friends, including SNS Guy and Married Guy, but I'm stuck now, not because of writer's block, but because I'm so busy with work and family that finding time is very difficult. I know you understand because the same issue has kept me from writing here as often as I would like.

As I make progress on the novel, however slow that progress may be, I've learned that I'm much better at writing smut than I am at writing romance. I can write a hot sex scene, but guiding characters through sharing their deepest feelings is much more difficult. probably because sex is much easier for me than sharing feelings.

When I told my therapist about the book, she said, "Feelings?  Romantic feelings?  You're really going to write about that?" And then she smiled that hideously condescending smile that she takes on sometimes. She invited me to share some feelings I've had recently.

(crickets)

If I had a nickel for every time someone asked me how I feel about something, I'd be rich. The last time I was with T (who she knows as Xavier, just because we all live in the same town and I wanted to be sure that his identity was safe), she asked what feelings I had for him. There was a long silence. Not an uncomfortable one, just a long one.

"I like him very much. I'm not in love with him. I enjoy his company. I get annoyed when he pulls away from me like I'm a threat to his freedom, but I can live with that."

It's at that point that she usually points out to me which of the things I've just said were really thoughts or attitudes, but not feelings.  Now she just has to repeat the word, "Feelings."

"Ok, ok, I said.  Affection. Occasional rejection and annoyance. Comfortable. Caring?  That's all I got. Except for the fact that he turns me on sexually like you wouldn't believe. I hear his voice and I'm wet and ready. Where's that on the feelings chart?"

It reminded me of the first time Hubby and I went to marriage counseling. He said something and the counselor looked at me and said, "So, Kat, how does that make you feel?"  And Hubby started laughing. The counselor was shocked and started to tell Hubby how inappropriate it was to laugh at me, but Hubby explained, "She can't tell you how she feels.  At least not on the spot.  She'll have to answer you next week." He was right. I'm much better at identifying feelings now than I used to be, but it can still be a challenge for me.

Anyway, my instinct is to have my two main characters fucking all the time - at least as often as I want to, which is a lot.  Fucking on the bus, on the bed, on the kitchen table, in the elevator, in the car, in the shower. But in a smutty romance novel, there must be some romance, so I need to build them up to fucking with some romance and feelings.  Ugh.

In the prowling world, the romance and feelings often, although not always, follow the initial sexual encounters. That, I understand.That, I can describe quite well.

Maybe that's the novel I should be writing.

I Got Lucky!!!

Yes, it's true.  After weeks of no sex at home, I finally got lucky with Hubby last night. All the stars aligned - neither of us sick, neither of us too tired, the kid in bed and asleep on time, and both of us in the mood at the same time. Yes, it felt like a miracle.

The interesting thing is that we did exactly the same thing we always do (he fingers me until I come, I suck his cock as long as he wants, he fucks me from behind), but because it has been awhile, it wasn't boring at all. It was kind of hot. Hubby?  Hot?  Yes.

And while I am very fond of my buddy Spartacus, there's nothing like having a real, live cock inside me and getting a nice hard fucking.

Afterwards, I said, "We should do that more often."

"Definitely," he responded.

Maybe I'll get lucky again soon.

Hair Pulling Sex God

I wasn't really in the mood for sex, but I wanted it anyway.  Wait, that's not entirely true.  I'm just about always in the mood for sex, but last night I wasn't feeling an urgent need.  I was just feeling that gnawing undercurrent of craving that I live with all the time. I was really into the idea a few hours earlier before Hubby started telling me who my friends should be.

Seriously, we were having a discussion about Daunt and Hubby started talking about who I should, and shouldn't, have as friends. He even named some women at church that he thought I should befriend.  I found it interesting that he left out all the women he screwed over the last five years, and I thought I'd really have something in common with them. 

But I kept my mouth shut and let him talk. However, on the inside I was saying, "Gee, Honey, in this century women are allowed to pick their own friends.  And, by the way, we get to vote now, too!"  I knew I was getting catty so I just let conversation die.

At bedtime, it was clear that Hubby was not going to initiate anything, so it was up to me to make it happen or go to bed frustrated - again.

I took my shower and went to bed, pulling the covers all the way back so I was laying naked on top of the sheet. Then I reached into the drawer next to the bed and pulled out Sparticus and put it on the bed next to me. I waited. 

Then I texted him and told him to come to bed. And I waited.

Eventually, he wandered into the room and a smile swept across his face as he saw me.

"It's about time," I said. "What does a girl have to do to get a good fucking around here?"

He said, "Exactly what you're doing. But give me a minute. I want put the trash cans out first."

Wow. I guess the trash couldn't wait for 30 minutes. To be fair, I know that Hubby is totally oblivious to the effect that it has on me when he says things like that. If I thought it was on purpose, that would be one thing, but this is just who he is. It really makes me wonder how he convinced me to marry him way back when I would not have ignored comments like that.

Anyway, he came back in about 5 minutes, and climbed into bed.  I asked him if he would mind at least washing his hands since he had just handled the trash. He grudgingly agreed.

When he came back to bed, I was ready.  No, I was more than ready. I had spend the majority of the time I was waiting thinking about JJ, and what he would be doing in this situation. I am 100% sure that he would say that the trash could wait.

Hubby grabbed the lube from the nightstand.  I told him, "You're not going to need that."

"Oh?" he replied as he reached down between my legs and slid a finger inside me.

"Oh! I guess we don't need this," he said, tossing the bottle of lube aside. "You should have told me you were this ready.  I would have put off taking out the trash."

Oh no, I thought. Don't even go there.  Did you really just say that???

I decided to ignore the comment. I grabbed Sparticus and put it in his hand. We were back on track quickly. He slid the large shaft inside me slowly and turned it on. I gasped. It felt better than I was expecting. Then he turned on the little vibrator and pressed it against my clit. An intense jolt of pleasure shot up my back and I squealed a bit. Hubby chuckled and turned the vibrator down just a bit.  Ah.....perfect.

I closed my eyes and remembered the last time I was alone with JJ. We stood kissing for a long time as he slowly undressed me. I sat on the edge of the bed and took off his shorts and sucked on his cock for awhile. His cock was beautiful. Hard, glistening, dripping with precum, delicious. He leaned me back on the bed, pulled my legs up and entered me. I felt that same amazing sensation I felt every time he entered me. I looked up at him and watched his face as he fucked me. I remember thinking that I'd freeze that moment in time if I could. I'd have to settle for burning it forever into my brain. It didn't take me long to come. He came soon after and seeing the look on his face as he came gave me another kind of pleasure.

I held that thought as I took the little vibrator from Hubby's hand and started holding it myself.  He kept working the big shaft of Spartacus and he leaned over and began sucking on one of my nipples. Three seconds later I was coming hard - moaning, shaking.

A minute or so later, he pulled Spartacus out of me and tossed it aside. He got up on his knees on the bed with his cock erect and jerking a little. I knew what that meant.  I rolled over onto my side and up onto my elbow and took him into my mouth. I started sucking him slowly, but very deeply, taking him in as far as I could.  Every third stroke I'd hold for a beat or two with the head of his cock in my throat. He moaned. That was exactly the response I was going for. 

He got harder and I could tell that he was going to come soon.  Just as I was getting ready to make that happen, he tapped my shoulder twice. That's our sign for "Stop now. I want to do something else." I have no idea how that signal came to be for us, but it's very clear. The shoulder tap means "stop immediately," so I did, and I looked up at him. 

He said, "I want you from behind."  I smiled.  My favorite.

As I positioned myself, my mind flashed again to the last time I was with JJ. In that room, there was a mirrored wall at the head of the bed, so I could watch him move behind me and I could watch him fuck me as much as I wanted. I pushed back the emotion I was feeling about him right then. I missed him.

But there was no mirror here.  That's not the only thing that was different. Hubby is not as thick as JJ, but he's a shade longer, so the cock inside me felt completely different - amazingly good, but different. Also, JJ pounds me hard and fast, which I absolutely love; Hubby is slow and deliberate, usually making me do most of the work. So there was no fantasizing about JJ at this point. That was clearly not him behind me.

I wanted to come again.  I tried to.  I moved a little faster.  Hubby slowed me down. I tilted my hips so I could feel his cock in just the right spot. Hubby grabbed my hips and re-positioned me. Bummer. 

He came quickly.  I couldn't see him, but I could hear the satisfaction in his voice as he moaned loudly while he released into me.

He held there for a while.  I remained still, giving him all the time he wanted to feel it. Then he reached forward and gently tugged on the hair on the back of my head, and we both burst into laughter.

When Hubby first learned about my cheating, we had many long talks about what was missing in our sex life. One of the things I shared with him was that I loved having my hair pulled. We talked about it at length.  He tried a few times, but it was a feeble attempt. In fact, it made me laugh more than it turned me on. Sometimes he'd pull it after I had already come. It was clear he wasn't into it and he just wouldn't pull hard enough.  The problem is that he can't bring himself to hurt me physically - even if I want him to. So, what started out as him trying to do something different sexually, something that I enjoy, turned into a joke between us.

He pulled out of me slowly. I rolled over. He leaned over and kissed me and said, "I love you, more than you'll ever know."

I replied, "I love you, too, you hair pulling sex god."

His face lit up and he wrapped his arms around me and kissed my forehead. I snuggled against him, really glad that he had taken the trash out earlier so he didn't have to get up now. This was a moment to burn into my brain and remember forever.

Vacation Sex

I'm on vacation for a couple of weeks. That's why you haven't heard from me lately, but you're never far from my thoughts, Prowlers.

Unfortunately, the reason you haven't heard from me so far is the same reason why I was pretty sure there would be no vacation sex for me. I'm never alone.

Never. Alone.

All day I'm trapped in a mini-van with my husband and offspring, with the exception of occasional sightseeing stops, and all night I'm trapped in a hotel room with my husband and offspring.  I don't do well without alone time, but living in close quarters with a group of males is particularly trying at times. But that's a story for another day.

Anyway, tonight we got back from dinner and the boys decided to go down to the pool. The minute the door closed behind them I ran to the door, pushed the security latch closed so it couldn't be opened even with a key, and started peeling off my clothes as I headed toward the bed, shouting at Hubby, "Come on! We have at least 30 minutes. Let's go!"

I flopped on the bed naked and looked at him expectantly. He said, "I really want to get these bags organized so the van will be easier to pack tomorrow. Maybe later."

I sat straight up. "Are you fucking kidding me? There is no 'later' and you know it. This is the first time we have been alone in five days and who knows if we'll have another chance like this."

"You'll survive a couple of weeks without sex. You've done it before."

"Fine," I said. "I'll just play with Spartacus." And I reached into my suitcase and pulled out my favorite toy.

Not even looking up from his task, he shook his head, saying, "I can't believe you brought that thing."

I didn't answer. I just spread out on the bed and turned on Spartacus. I closed my eyes and disappeared into my fantasy world.

"Dammit, Kat!" I could hear that Hubby was a bit annoyed.

"Don't interrupt," I moaned.

The next thing I knew, Hubby was on the bed next to me, kissing my neck, and attempting to pull Spartacus out of me. I could feel his hardness pressing against my leg.

"No, no, no," I said. "You had your chance. You gave up your turn to Spartacus. Now you have to wait."

I smiled and went back to what I was doing.

Hubby groaned, "Tell him to hurry up. I want my turn," just before he took one of my nipples into his mouth.

After that, it took no time at all for me to cum hard. Just to yank his chain a little, I decided to say, "Oh, Spartacus!" as I came.

He growled and slowly pulled Spartacus out of me and rolled me over. I lifted myself up onto my knees and elbows just in time for him to slide deep inside me. After a few strokes he pulled out and said, "I don't want anybody's sloppy seconds. You gave your pussy to Spartacus, so I'll take your ass." Before he was half way through with that statement, his cock was already in me. I squealed (it really did hurt) and instinctively tried to pull away, but he grabbed my hips and pulled me back against him forcefully.

"Oh no. You started this. You're gonna finish it." Then he pounded me hard, forcing me to push against the headboard just to keep from being slammed into it.

He groaned loudly as he came. When he pulled out, I whined a little wishing it could have lasted longer.

He got up, cleaned up a bit and went back to his packing task as if nothing had happened. I jumped into the shower, pleased that I managed to get a little vacation sex after all. Then I took the security lock off the door and started writing this. Five minutes ago, the door burst open and the room was full of boys again.

My youngest jumped onto the bed and said, "Mommy, you should have come swimming with us! We had so much more fun than you did!"

I tried to keep my smile from betraying what I was thinking.

"I'm sure you're right, Sweetie," I replied. "Tell me all about the fun you had."

While he was talking, I noticed Hubby was smiling.

He said, under his breath, "You guys didn't have more fun than I did."

My oldest heard his little comment and said,"Dad! That is so gross! We can't leave you two alone for even a few minutes."

Well, there goes my chance for any more vacation sex.

Face Time

I had some time at home alone on Friday night (a very unusual situation), so JJ and I started texting back and forth. At first we were catching up with what has been going on in both of our lives. Then the conversation became a little naughty, of course.

Because I'm a good girl scout and always prepared, I had already moved to my bedroom and taken off my pants and panties.

I knew that he'd be asking for a photo soon, so I decided to get another step ahead of him. I snapped a quick pussy pic and sent it over.

It never ceases to amaze me how easy it is to send a picture these days compared to the "old days." Yes, I know I'm showing my age, but when I started my first online relationship, we chatted via IRC (Internet Relay Chat for you young people).  Why?  Because there weren't any other choices! AOL came out and changed all that, but I'm talking about before AOL. If you wanted to send a picture in those days, you had two choices: send it via snail mail or fax it.  That was it. This was before desktop scanners, before cell phone cameras. It was even before most people had cell phones.  They were called "car phones" then and very few people actually had them. So, when I can snap a photo with my cell phone and send it to someone all within about 5-10 seconds, it still feels like something pretty close to a miracle to me.

But I digress......again.....

Soon after he got the first picture, he asked, "Where's Spartacus?"

(If you don't know what JJ was talking about, go back and read Playing with Spartacus. You'll see a photo of Spartacus there, too.)

After teasing him for awhile I finally snapped a pic of Spartacus, but that wasn't enough for him.  No. He wanted to see Spartacus...uh.....more engaged with me. I slid it in me just a little bit and snapped and sent another pic.

"More," he wrote.

So, I pushed it all the way inside me and turned it on, and took another pic.

Now, I have trouble playing and manipulating the phone camera with one hand anyway, but when I'm in a state of arousal, it's very difficult.

I hit "send" to send him the pic, thinking I'd have a few seconds, maybe even a minute to play while I waited for his response, but within 10 seconds the phone rang with his Face Time request.

For those of you without iPhones, Face Time is video calling. Video calling also possible on Yahoo Messenger and a bunch of other programs, but FaceTime is easier because you don't have to open an app.

I accepted his request and there he was, my handsome JJ smiling at me, telling me to show him.  I put the phone on speaker, re-positioned the phone so he could see well, and....mmm.....let him talk me to pleasure while Spartacus worked his magic.

Then it was his turn.  He flipped to the rear camera on his phone and I was filled with an almost irresistible desire to lick my screen as he did what I wished I were there to do for him.

We chatted a little while more, and then it was time to go.

As I cleaned up before my boys came home, I remembered how phone sex went in the old days.  It was great, but Face Time is like supercharged phone sex.

Thank God for technology!

Frustrated Kat

Hubby came to me yesterday with a very concerned look on his face and he asked if we could talk.  Those are ominous words. "Can we talk?" Honestly, I wanted to say, "Do we have to?" but what came out of my mouth was, "Of course.  What's up?"

I held my breath until I heard him say, "What's wrong? You don't want sex  anymore."

First of all, that's how my hubby is.  If something is amiss for a week or two, it's "forever." That's the way it will be for the rest of our lives.

Second, I told you yesterday that I've been on a deadline lately.  Not only has that work kept me away from you, Prowlers, but it has also been making me get up early and get to bed late.  I haven't been home as much, and when I have been home, I've been tired.

But not want sex anymore? Oh, please.

Apparently he noticed that his new-found love of anal has been leaving me...uh....unsatisfied.  That's a good sign, but he was concerned because I wasn't pushing for it. The truth is that I have simply been too tired to have that conversation one...more...time.

So, I've been taking care of things myself, if you know what I mean.

I've been pretty open and blunt recently since we got things out on the table, so I just told him the truth - that it has been easier to handle it myself than to negotiate "getting mine" when he has been so happy about exploring anal. However, I added that his selfish sex season would be ending as soon as I got beyond by current deadline.

But he wasn't really concerned about me "getting mine" at all.  He wanted to know if I was getting it somewhere else since I wasn't getting it at home. I really wished he would just ask the question straight up, but he didn't, so I threw him a line -

"And no," I said, "I haven't been having sex with anyone else during this period, except myself, of course."

I wanted to scream, "My vagina hasn't felt a live cock for weeks!!!! Ok, 10 days, but it feels like weeks. You have apparently forgotten that I'm female - I might as well be some guy since all you want is my ass, and JJ has been too busy for me lately.  And you think I don't want sex???"

But I didn't say any of that. He felt reassured, and it ended there.

Last night, I got us to bed a little early, and I snuggled up against him, kissing his neck, tracing my finger along his inner thigh.

I asked, "So, you implied earlier that you wanted me to be more interested in sex, and I am, so......." I put his hand on my wet pussy to prove it.

And he told me he was tired and not feeling very well.

"Raincheck?" he asked.

"Of course, Honey," I responded.

Then I grabbed Spartacus and headed to the other room.

Yes, I am a frustrated Kat.