Saturday, May 4, 2013

Lust and Desire

A good friend of mine sent me an email this morning about the difference between lust and desire. I loved it, so I asked him if I could share it with you, and he agreed. Enjoy.

*******

Do you know the difference between lust and desire?

I do.

Lust is simple, the pleasure of the flesh. Lust is the aerobics instructor who was so incredibly flexible but you can't, for the life of you, remember her name. Lust is the waitress in some nameless restaurant in whatever city it was who flirted with you, called your bluff (well, called my bluff) and left me feeling like Lady Macbeth: needing a shower and knowing that all the water in the world wouldn't make me feel clean again. Lust makes you do stupid things, things you know you will regret but seem so right at the time, because you really don't care about the outcome.

Desire is where you go to sleep thinking about a person and wake up with absolutely no break in the train of thought. Desire is where you get up at 6am on a Saturday because you can't sleep, start to make the coffee and realize that your hands are trembling and damp. Desire is where the thought of that person makes you sweat because suddenly you're harder than Chinese algebra. Desire will make you hesitant because you don't want to fuck things up. If necessity is the mother of invention, desire is the father of necessity.

I've been successful with women because usually I know what to say, when to say it, how to say it and say it with confidence. I like to think I'm not too hard on the eyes. I'm smart, sophisticated, cultured, successful and know what wine to order with fish, the maitre 'd at Incanto and how to play the guitar licks from "The Wall." Is it so difficult to think I could be desired, in turn? Of course not - but with lust, you don't care, with desire, you do.

*******

Your thoughts, Prowlers?

6 comments:

Clem said...

I like that. I like to think, I think that way.
i have both, lust and desire, and yes, they can contradict each other in the ways he mentions.

I'm filled with desire right now, for a woman that I've known and loved a long time ago. We recently met, the sparks are still there, and the definitions of desire here mimic what I think and feel.

I like his last paragraph too. With the desire I have, I can fell desired too.

~McK said...

I think it's spot on and also written after experience (i.e. knowledge gained by age and experience). I literally lust for my "JJ" wantonly, without rationale. But my desire for him, that need, that desire is an ache and I yearn for him, his thoughts, his voice, his happiness. Love the post. Thank you to your friend for agreeing and to you for sharing!

cammies on the floor said...

I like the differentation between the two and found myself agreeing, except the negative connotation with lust. Lust seems to be a more fleeting and wilder word, but it can be glorious just as desire.
Desire is so much deeper, and caring, so well said.
Glad he let you share.

Cara Janes said...

Something tells me that I'd enjoy being the object of this man's desire...

All About Love And Sex said...

Lust is just purely sex, with no emotions attach !

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