Sunday, February 23, 2014

A Pussy Record

I was watching a cable news show this morning when a segment came on about security for the Olympics in Sochi. The guest on the show was a news correspondent, who really had no qualifications to talk about security in Sochi except for the fact that he was in Sochi for part of the two weeks the Olympics were in town.

The guest and the anchor of the show agreed that security must have been good because there were no major incidents.

Then the anchor asked, "Did the security cause a problem for any of the athletes or visitors?"

The correspondent answered, "Not really, unless you were a member of the band Pussy Riot."


"Yes, Pussy Riot was questioned intensely several times at the protest area, and two of the members of Pussy Riot were detained while walking in the Olympic Village. Most recently, Pussy Riot members were harassed by the Cossacks."

Sounding legitimately shocked, the anchor then said something like, "Wow, this was a bad time to be a member of Pussy Riot, I guess."

The correspondent chuckled and added, "Well, as you know, Pussy Riot has been both an inspiration for protesters and a lightning rod for government attention and disapproval."

It went on, but you get the point, right? I think he must have had a bet with someone that he would say Pussy Riot a certain number of times, probably because they never get to say pussy on the news. I felt like I was in a junior high locker room when somebody said "pussy" and everyone giggled.

I'm sure they have the record for the number of times "pussy" was said during a broadcast.  In fact, I think it was probably the most times that pussy was said in a 24 hour period (or longer) on any news channel.

Pussy, pussy, pussy.

I hope he won the bet.

Wednesday, February 19, 2014

Room 201 (Part 2 of 2)

Click here to read Part 1 of this post.


I smiled, rolled over, and positioned myself on my knees and forearms. He slid himself inside me and fucked me slowly for about 30 seconds, then he pulled out and pressed his cock into my ass. I squealed and pushed back against him. As he pounded my ass I had a split second flashback to a time about a year and a half ago when he told me that he didn't mind if I screwed around with someone else as long as I remembered that my ass was his.

I was about to giggle about that, but I was yanked out of my daydream by the burning sting I felt when he brought his hand down hard on my bottom. I flinched and squealed. He slapped me on the other side. I flinched again. I waited for another slap, but it didn't come. Instead, he rabbit-pumped me - hard!- until he came.

He leaned over and kissed my back, and then he rolled back onto the bed next to me and we kissed some more - not frantic and demanding kisses, but gentle and passionate ones.

"You know," I told him. "It's been well over a year since I had any anal and that was with you."

He smiled and said, "Good," and continued kissing me.

I suppose my ass is his.

In between kisses, we talked again, this time about what's going on with his work and how our hotel has changed ownership again. We figured that it had changed ownership about 4 times since our first time there. There's a poster on an easel in the lobby showing the newly renovated rooms, but the room we were in, one of our regular rooms, was exactly the same. Same mirror covering the whole wall at the head of the bed.  Same carpet. Same ugly curtains that had come partially unhooked. The good news was that it was a bit cheaper now (Woohoo!).

He silenced my chatter by kissing me some more, and he got no argument from me.  I've always loved his kisses.

Unexpectedly, he got up on his knees and patted my back.

"Come on," he said.

I raised an eyebrow.  "Again?"


This time when he entered me I was in need again. I closed my eyes and didn't think.  I just focused on the feelings and sensations. I was torn, wanting to come, but also wanting it to last forever. In the end, I had no choice.  My body took over and I shuddered, then relaxed into the pleasure flowing electrically through my whole body. Through the fog, I felt him come.  Then he leaned over and kissed my back, then my lower back. The contrast between the power he shows when he fucks me and the gentleness when he kisses my back like he does melts my heart every time.

We curled up together again and kissed some more. It occurred to him that we should check messages since both of our phones had been buzzing and beeping for the last hour. My messages didn't have anything that couldn't wait. Unfortunately, he had a message from his wife indicating that she needed him, so he had to go early. We took another 15 minutes, though, to cuddle, kiss, and talk. We cleaned up and got dressed, and before we left we agreed on the next time we'd meet. Parting was easier because I knew when I'd see him again.

When we got to the parking lot, he kissed me at my car, and then walked to his and drove away. And so our encounter was over.

This morning, I miss him. I'm sore from our playtime, but it's the kind of soreness I love. It reminds me of the passage from The Underfucked Pussy post that talks about a woman needing to fucked wide open by a man, needing his strength, his firmness, and his masculine energy. The soreness reminds me physically that I experienced that...

.....and that my ass is his.

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Room 201 (Part 1 of 2)

I looked at my phone and the text read, "Room 201."

I replied, "Geez, you're already there?"  He was about an hour early. That's ok. Eager is good.

I had to wait another 10-15 minutes before I could leave without attracting attention, but as soon as I could, I texted, "Leaving now."

The 30 minute drive went quickly.  I wondered what it would be like to see him after so long. Would it be awkward? As good as before?  Better?

When I pulled into the hotel parking lot, I sent my final text, "I'm here."

I walked in the front door and headed straight to the elevator and up to the second floor. Room 201 was close to the elevator.  The door was propped open by the slider lock.  I pushed the door open and returned the lock to its proper position before closing the door.

I stepped in."Hello?"

He walked around the corner and stood in front of me. I smiled and said, " Hi, JJ."  He slipped his arms around me and said, "Hi, Baby" just before kissing me deeply. We stood there kissing for a long time. Eventually he pulled off my blouse and bra and touched a breast. I sighed what would be the first of many sighs acknowledging both the pleasure of the sensations and memories of experiencing them before.

He reached a hand into my pants and started stroking my clit. I wiggled out of my pants to give him easier access. His was an experienced touch.  He knew exactly how to please me. He should.  He's had years of practice.

I started tugging on his shirt, trying to get it off. He pulled it off for me, then his pants, and we jumped into bed. It made me smile that before we did, we followed the same routine of pulling back the bedspread - him on his side and me on mine - and then the blanket and sheet. It had been 11 months since we'd seen each other, but those little routines and habits were still there.

We got in bed and I curled up next to him, feeling a comfortable understanding that this was where I belonged. It felt right. He kissed me again and again before sliding his hand between my legs. He slid a couple of fingers inside me, finger fucking me. After a couple of minutes, he rubbed his palm across my clit with each stroke.  That was like flipping a switch.  I was still kissing him, and I screamed into his mouth as I came, bucking against his hand.

I knew that was his warm up. As soon as my shuddering subsided, he said, "Get on your knees." I scurried into position. He moved behind me and slid his hard cock into me slowly.  I sighed and moaned this time. Ohmygod it felt amazing, filling me completely.

Not only do I *love* JJ's cock, but I haven't had a cock inside me for a few months. I know.  That's crazy, isn't it?  Me! After a while, you tell yourself that you don't really need it, and that works until you are fucked again and reminded exactly how much you do need it.

"Fuck me!" I moaned loudly, hoping he would go faster, and he did. I got dizzy  when he started pounding me full force, not because it hurt, but because it was pure pleasure - all control taken away, grabbing onto the sheets and bracing myself by putting a hand on the wall in front of me to keep from being pushed into it, his fingers digging into my hips. The orgasm came on me like an explosion, like the dizziness was the burning fuse and the launch propelled me to another level of pleasure. I screamed and bucked against him. Soon after I came, while I was still coming, actually, he released into me, groaning loudly, pulling me back onto him as he took his final thrusts.

After he came he pulled out and collapsed next to me.  Holy shit! I thought. I have missed that so much. I looked at him and realized I've missed him so much.

I curled up next to him and we kissed some more. In between kisses, we finally talked.

"I've missed you."

"I've missed you, too."

"I never stopped loving you."

"Me, neither."

"Don't ever leave me again."

"I won't."

Eventually, we started talking about ordinary things. Had he started training yet for that upcoming race? How my boys are, what's going on with his family, you saved how much when you switched from AT&T to T-Mobile?

More kisses, then he reached between my legs again. Time to go again? I thought. He answered that unspoken question a moment later when he smiled and said, "On your knees again."

To be continued.....

Saturday, February 15, 2014

An Unforgettable Event

I watched the first several episiodes of House of Cards on Netflix last night. In episode 2,  one of the main  characters reveals that she had been raped in college. She had kept it quiet for 25 years, telling no one but her husband, but then her rapist appears in her life again briefly. He acts like nothing ever happened and he even leaned over and kissed her cheek. A few days later, she publicly shared what happened and named her rapist.

Seeing him brought back the memories and the feelings surrounding the awful event, and finally, 25 years after the fact, she took her power back and put the pressure back on her rapist. Will that make her feel better?

Maybe.  Priobably not.  But it's worth it to her if there is any chance at relief. Relief from what?

Watching her situation play out triggered my own memories.  Her assault took place about 25 years prior to the accusation of her rapist. Mine was only 11 years ago. Writing that feels so strange. Eleven years. That was before my youngest child was born. That sounds like a long time ago, but it feels like last week.

I was just watching the show, excited that the new new season was finally here, and my heart started racing, I felt sick to my stomach, and my eyes quickly filled with tears. When that happens, I know I can't close my eyes because then the images will start flashing in front of of me, but the longer I hold out, the more likely it is that I'll start seeing the images anyway.

That's when the full blown PTSD hits. Then I can't see anything. I can barely breathe, and emotionally it feels like I'm right back there - fighting back until I had no fight left; feeling every blow, every cut, every thrust; wondering if I'd ever see my family again.

Sometimes it hits out of the blue. It will be sparked by a particular smell or the way shadows fall on the street or a man wearing a brown sportscoat. Then I feel a sense of panic and all that goes with it - rapid heartbeat, queasy stomach, sweaty brow and palms. Imagine the emotional and physical sensations of being chased by someone with a weapon who wants to kill you.  Then imagine them just erupting within you when you're not in immenent danger at all, just because you passed by someone in a the grocery store wearing a certain cologne or you hear a car door slam. Sometimes you have no idea at all why it hit you.

So you isolate yourself.  Sometimes it's isolation in a crowd, where you seem to socialize a lot, but you're careful not to let anyone really know you. You try to bottle up feelings that can't be bottled up. Eventually, they'll explode.  Until then, you'll be alone.

Over 22 million women in the United States have been raped.  That's about 1 in every 6 women. Almost a third of rape victims develop PTSD at some point in their lifetime and 11% still have PTSD today,

In addition, 30% of rape victims suffer from major depression. They are 4.1 times more likely than non-crime victims to have comtemplated suicide, and 13 times more likely to attempt suicide than non-crime victims.

And it doesn't only happen to women. Almost three million American men have been raped, going way beyond the estimated 600,000 inmates in the prison system who have been raped.

While only 70% of female rape victims withhold the information from their families, 90% of male victims don't tell anyone.  It took me 8 years to tell my husband and that was because the PTSD was so bad I had to either tell him or let him think I was crazy.

It strikes me that there are millions of women walking around as survivers of sexual assault who have PTSD and/or are suffering from other negative effects who are not even aware of what's really going on.

They don't want to say anything because they think they'll be judged, and all the evidence indicates that they are right. People expect soldiers to have PTSD, but they don't expect it from a homemaker or businesswoman.

What if we just assumed that whenever a woman exhibits behaviors like those I described above she just might be suffering from something?  What if we just assumed that she had suffered and was recovering from an unforgettable event?  What if we chose to be compassionate without knowing exactly what's happening?

For women who have been raped and end up with PTSD, recovery takes  place over decades, not months.  The impact of that one unforgettable event lasts a lifetime.

Wednesday, February 12, 2014

If Men Wrote Candy Hearts

A Few Tips for Mistress Day Gifts

Getting something for your wife or girlfriend is easy. Choosing something for your mistress is much more difficult. You have to remember that, if she's married, it needs to be something that she either won't be taking home or that will not attract any attention from her husband. You'll have to get together to  give it to her because you probably can't mail it to her. The easy choices that you are used to relying on are not available to you - flowers, etc.

Mistress gift giving may not be easy, but don't ignore the holiday. That would send a message you probably don't want to send - that she's not important to you, that you don't care enough to recognize the holiday.

First, let's start with the card. Of course you'll want to get her a card. If you give her a physical card, she's going to have to throw it away, as much as she doesn't want to.  One strategy is to get a card, write your personal note in it, scan it, and then after you have given her the card, you can email her the scanned version. You can also send an e-card, but not as much effort goes into those, so they are not quite as special.

You can also give her a love letter, or love email, in lieu of a card. The whole point of a love letter is to share your feelings. If you're not prepared to do that, then this is not the option for you.

Speaking of feelings....if you love her, for godsake, just tell her! Get over the mental masturbation you practice whenever the L word comes up about what kind of commitment it means, whether you can love your wife and another woman, and how long it may last. Forget all that. I'm talking about pure emotion, completely divorced from your logical mind. If you love her right now, tell her so.  We all know that tomorrow is never guaranteed, but to avoid love today because you're afraid it won't be here tomorrow is just....well, silly. You're alive now. She's in your life now.

And if you've been avoiding the L word for some reason, there's not a better gift in the world you could give her.

What about other gifts? You need to select something that she can easily slip into her regular life unnoticed. What fits into this category is different for every woman. Some of us can slip an pair of earrings into the jewelry box unnoticed and others of us can't. As many of you know, I'm a big fan of small, inexpensive, but meaningful gifts. I like little things that I can use or carry every day that will remind me of the giver. I know I may be in the minority and that many women like expensive gifts, but that has never been me. My favorite gift has always been, and remains, books. I go through so many books that Hubby never notices new ones and when he does, he assumes I bought them for myself, which is usually true.

Don't forget about gift certificates for massages and other spa services. Make her feel good when you're not with her making her feel good.

Or you can go for sex toys and/or tasty lubricants.  Those come with a storage issue (where do you hide it safely?), but they also make your playtime more fun and they can become one of those gifts that keeps on giving.

Whatever you do, make sure you think about your sweetie when you do it and select something that is particularly special for her.

What about turning the tables?  What should women know about Mistress Day gifts for their lovers. I know I'm exposing the double standard, but women are not expected to recognize the holiday with their lovers unless they choose to. If you want to, go ahead, but keep the same guidelines in mind.

Friday, February 7, 2014

The Underfucked Pussy

I was minding my own business, scrolling the through the scores of animal pics, inspirational quotes, and meaningless comments about food and snow (Yes, it's cold.  We know.), when I came across an interesting little piece by Kendall Williams of My Tiny Secrets. The title caught me first - The Underfucked Pussy Epidemic - mainly because I was logged in to my real life, boring, vanilla account. It's the account with all the friends, family, and work acquaintances, most of whom gasp and giggle if the word "pussy" is said aloud.

I think I even looked around when I clicked on the link.  God forbid that anyone who knows the respectable me (and only the respectable me) should see me reading about pussies and fucking.

Anyway, I read it.  The post talks about the importance of what the author calls gourmet orgasms to a woman's happiness and fulfillment, and how so many women don't have any orgasms at all, let alone anything close to gourmet.

Men have been telling us forever that if we just fucked more we'd feel better, be happier, be thinner, feel secure.....whatever is missing from our lives, sex will solve it. While that may be an extreme perspective, Ms. Williams holds the point of view that many of women's problems - depression, anxiety, hormonal fluctuations - can be alleviated or even solved by some good fucking and gourmet orgasms.

While I can't say that sex is the cure for everything, I think she's dead on that  most women in our culture are completely closed to a part of themselves that many of them don't even know exists. They think that surrendering themselves completely to a man and to pleasure would mean that they would lose something. They don't know what, just that it's scary. The reality is the other way around.  The cost of icy frigidity and tightly bottling up your sexuality is high. The prospect of a lifetime of that is scary for me, so much so that I won't live that way.

Ms. Williams writes:

"Worse yet, she won’t tell you the truth about what is going on because she herself does not understand. Even if she has a clue her voice will be seized by the darkness of her pussy frustration and her ego will have hold of her so strongly that she won’t be capable of vocalizing the unspeakable to you. That unspeakable being that she needs to be f-ked wide open by a man that can penetrate not only her flesh but her heart and soul. She needs his strength, his firmness, his masculine energy to be unleashed in her at a cellular level and TAKE her beyond the point of no return and right into the heavens of rapture. Only at this level can she trust her man and allow herself once again to be seen."

Wow. Let me repeat part of that so you don't miss it:

"....she needs to be f-ked wide open by a man that can penetrate not only her flesh but her heart and soul. She needs his strength, his firmness, his masculine energy to be unleashed in her at a cellular level and TAKE her beyond the point of no return and right into the heavens of rapture. Only at this level can she trust her man and allow herself once again to be seen."

Fuckin' A. In my opinion, that is exactly what every woman needs.  I know it's what I need. Without it, I'm not complete. Period.

For all the wonderful things it has brought us, feminism has done us a huge disservice in this area. By the millions, women have been duped into thinking that we don't need a man to support us, we don't need a man to help raise our children, and we don't need a man for sexual pleasure, mainly because we don't need sex. Now we come to learn that two out of three of those assumptions are completely wrong.

For a woman to be completely fulfilled in all areas of her life, including sexually, she needs a man.....or more than one. ;-)  Just having a man isn't enough, though. He needs to be able to penetrate her body, heart and soul. He needs to be mentally and emotionally strong enough to break through her emotional defenses and her apparent lack of desire. He has to be able to break through her culturally acquired repression. He has to be willing, also, to let go of some of his own protective barriers so her can take her in.

Every single day I run into women who are clearly cases of pussy frustration. They are uptight and they walk around with a cauldron of anger and/or depression bubbling just below the surface. It's sad.

Ms. Williams is absolutely right. There is an underfucked pussy epidemic going on. The tragedy is that it's so easily remedied, yet still out of reach for so many.

Thursday, February 6, 2014

Mistress Day - A Time for Extra Caution

Valentine's Day is just around the corner, so this is a good time to start talking about Mistress Day.  Mistress Day is traditionally celebrated on February 13th, the day before Valentine's Day because prowlers need to spend Valentine's Day with their spouses. I say "traditionally" but there really isn't much about it that is traditional, except for the fact that it has become so common that just about everyone knows about it.  That makes it a red flag for prowlers.


Because if you know that February 13th is Mistress Day, your wife or husband may know, too, and will be watching you especially closely to make sure that your time is accounted for on that day. My suggestion is to discuss it with your lover and pick another day to celebrate, say the 12th or 15th, or even something the following week. You need to discuss it because if you just assume that you'll celebrate it the following week, your Mistress may think you forgot about it, and what does that mean for you? It means there will be another woman not having sex with you.

I'll write a post specifically on tips for Mistress Day gifts, but you should start thinking about it now so you aren't doing anything at the last minute.  Waiting 'til the last minute will likely mean that you'll be in a hurry and that's when we make mistakes. Take the time to make a plan and execute it carefully, and everything should be just fine.

I'll share one tip with you now of what not to do.  Don't ignore it. In my Valentine's Day post last year I shared with you how my special someone at the time told me all about what he did to make Valentine's Day special for his wife, and then he did nothing for me.  Nothing.  Nada. Don't misunderstand.  Listening to the what he did for his wife was fine.  It was very sweet and that didn't bother me a bit. The part that bothered me was being completely taken for granted. Those of you who know me well know that it doesn't take much to make me happy. That's what made it sting all the more. A minimum of effort is all that would have been required.

The irony is that Valentine's Day and Mistress Day are all about letting your wife and lover know that you do not take them for granted, that you appreciate them, and in many cases, that you love them.

So, there are two messages of caution here.  First, be very careful about how you celebrate Mistress Day. Your spouse may be watching you.  Second, be careful not to ignore it with your lover.  Make sure you let her know that you appreciate her.