Thursday, July 31, 2014

Dodging a Bullet Fired by a "Frighteningly Intelligent" Woman

Sometimes you get a close call when you meet someone on AM. Things start out well, but then they turn, and if they turn before you have invested too much time or given away too much personal information, you feel grateful, like you just dodged a bullet. That's what happened to a close friend of mine.

He shared an email exchange he had with a woman earlier this week. He told me they had only had a few back and forth interactions on AM before attempting to move to email, but that things were looking good.  He sent his email address which happens to refer to his occupation as a lawyer.  She asked if he is, indeed, a lawyer, and he replied that yes, he is.

Here's how she responded. I'm leaving in all errors that were in the original message so you get a complete picture,

"It is an ABSOLUTE F-ING Deal killer, period. 

Lawyers are intellegent and that is not a complement, collectively you people have figured out how to be the primary beneficiaries of the legal system. 

The firm wrongfully sued has to pay $$$$ to you assholes and the person genuinely screwed can't get good representation without coughing a huge percentage, and as such they NEVER get whole. 

Life choices are what they are, you made one years ago and it isn't going to change. 
My life choice is that I refuse to waste time with losers, you are simply one at a more educated level. 

Thanks anyway."

As you might expect, my advice to my friend (let's call him Baseball Guy - BG), was to walk away.  Don't respond.  Be grateful to have dodged a bullet and move along to the next one.

Did he listen?  Of course not! Baseball Guy is quite confident, but I didn't think that anyone could turn that situation around.  Still, he tried.

Here's how he responded:

"I've been brooding about this all afternoon. Look, lumping me in with all the asshole lawyers (and, yeah, there are a lot of them) is just like saying you don't like all Muslims because of 9/11. Whatever you may think of lawyers, in general, doesn't define me: I'm a very good person with a strong sense of social justice, including a lot of work on the kind of tort reform you mention. You'd be very pleasantly surprised, I think, to know more. 

I'll probably be (near you on) business soon. Have lunch or dinner or a drink or whatever with me and then, if you still think I've made a bad life choice, at least you'll know for sure. Don't worry - I'm not a stalker so if you don't reply I'll take that at face value. But I hope you do."

Well, that convinced me.  I'd love to meet him for lunch or dinner or a drink or whatever (I always seem to choose that "whatever" option, though).  Do you think it convinced her?

"Brood all you want, my position is not going to change. A whining lawyer, wow am I wet. Or is that the play the vicim shit you people do so well? 

This can't possibly be the first time that you've heard that attorney's do absolutely nothing to benefit society. 
Your occupation has very low job satisfaction ratings amongst practicing lawyers and a significantly higher than statistical average suicide rate. Always room for improvement, you'll have to figure out which way I am refering to. 

We have spent literally millons on councel defending frivilous B/S that would have been better resolved with the business end of a bat in my opinion, so your up hill battle is insurmountable here. 

As for Muslims, you could not have picked a worse comparison. I believe that Islam teaches that anyone who does not see things their way is fair game. Muslims whine about being lumped together but never come out agianst terrorism in any real, meaningful and substantive way. Yes I have actually read and understand the Koran, so argue all you want. Iread it as a result of being sued by a former employee Mohammed al- Ka BOOM who claimed descrimination. FUCK THEM!! 

As for being a good person............you are on a CHEATER'S website, you simply have no moral ground to hold that position. 

I know exactly what I am doing and why, You are trying to be good and bad at the same time, doesn't work. You can't have it both ways. 

I don't care in the slightest about your life choices, at the end when their is no way out, you'll figure that out and it will be too late for you. 

Stalk all you want the whore my husband hooked up with, her husband is a MMA fighter and has become a friend who actually enjoyes kicking the life out of cheaters 

You attorneys tend to think you are the smartest people in the room, which doesn't tend to end well. 

And yes I' frighteningly intelligent, and not about to fall for your poor put upon crap."

Wow.  At this point, all I could think was I told ya so. Even Baseball Guy knew it was over and that there was no chance of having any intimacy, or even semi-anonymous sex, with this woman.

She wrote that she's "frighteningly intelligent," which is scary given the many errors in her angry missive. I counted 14, and that was only counting what I'm pretty sure were unintentional errors.  The most intelligent people usually don't have that kind of error rate.

In addition, the truly intelligent among us typically don't demonstrate the overt bigotry that Baseball Guy's prospective lover showed in her comments. The "Mohammed al- Ka BOOM" comment made me gasp and shift uncomfortably (and not in a good way) in my chair.

There are many more comments I could make about these writings, but I want to throw it out for comments first to hear what the prowlers think.

I will say this, though. Supposedly, this woman is a real beauty on the outside. That's typically where Baseball Guy starts in his selection process - with the beautiful ones. I know some gorgeous women who are truly beautiful inside and out. Unfortunately, many men are blinded by the outside appearance to the degree that they just can't see that the inside doesn't match, or they overlook (or disparagingly dismiss) those who are not gorgeous on the outside, missing out forever on some unbelievably good and inwardly stunning women.  You may say that it doesn't really matter if you're just looking for a quick fuck or a casual sexual fling.  You're wrong about that. Do you really want to depend on someone so angry, bigoted, and "frighteningly intelligent" to keep your encounter or affair secret?

So, Prowlers, what are your thoughts about this exchange?  And don't worry, you don't have to be afraid of the husband of her husband's whore who is the MMA fighter (the husband, I mean, not the whore).  I'll protect you.


9 comments:

loat said...

He should consider himself lucky he found this out now. She is the type of person who would wreck his life and enjoy it.
She is Psycho! Run very fast from her and hope she forgets.

Anonymous said...

BG, hopefully you have learned your lesson. When your spidey senses tingle, listen to them and ignore the voice coming from your crotch!!!!

Ryan Beaumont said...

As Chris Rock says men are as faithful as our options. AM provides options for us but still on a very limited filtered scale. When we get to the point of e-mail we see a very clear "option." We are now thinking my chance of getting laid has gone from 1% to maybe 25+%, maybe more if you are quite confident. Given that you start to press and discount the negatives and focus on the looks and the thought of how great it is going to be to have sex with her.

We forget that if we were back in college and we met that girl at a party and she said something that "bat *hit crazy" we would just move onto option #2 for the night. But now in our 40's we don't have an option #2 or #3 so we do stuff that in retrospect is dangerous and stupid.

Hopefully it will all come out OK for him in the end. He should definitely disconnect immediately, the raw anger exhibited is frankly spooky! And God help this poor woman! I hope she never needs representation. Lawyers can seem unnecessary until somebody screws you and you would be only so happy to net 90% of what you are due. That is when lawyers don't seem so bad!

JackBader said...

Definitely dodged that bullet... and anyone that says their friends husband is an MMA fighter and would kick the life out of cheaters is laying down the bullshit pretty hard...

I have heard that response from a few people and when I met that particular person described I was not impressed. I spent time doing Krav Maga in a studio that taught MMA fighting and most of the guys that were in there fighting were overweight middle aged men that were trying to regain their childhood... yes a few were actually pretty tough but most did not like getting hit.

Simplicity said...

BG..RUN dont walk away from this one. I've had a few guys rant at me simply for not responding to their "hey wanna fuuk" emails but this is ridiculous. Bullet dodged indeed!!

Randy Barrister said...

PUA gurus teach the correct response to a bitchshield is to mosey on up and compliment her upon her assertive personality, agreeing 100% "yes all lawyers are assholes, I'd rather be an ass than a good guy, they're too boring. And I love the fact that you noticed that. I love assertive women." Do NOT disagree with a woman! They r always right lol. Yes Im working in a law office right now as I type this, and she was 100% correct.

Randy Barrister said...

And yes I got hit in the face by a flying head of lettuce this week. I had no idea my 100 lb hottie roommate could pack an accurate punch like a pro boxer using only a green leafy vegetable. Yes I deserved it, after she walked in on me and two of her friends fucking lol.

lust for love said...

Well, this woman must had a bad experience from a lawyer. No use trying to change her views.

Mick Collins said...

I think BB Guy should have taken your advice. But his cocky sense that he could turn this around at least led to this great blogfodder. Thanks for sharing.

Mick