By the way, during the cock discussion, Daunt sat there holding onto his beer like it was a life preserver. Every time I'd ask, "What do you think, Daunt?" he'd snap out of his "how-long-can-I-pretend-that-this-discussion-isn't-happening" stupor and shrug his shoulders.
The photo reminded me of that episode of Nip/Tuck where Christian Troy was having sex with that ugly gal who had a hot body and he made her put a bag over her face. Not that BruceD is ugly...absolutely not! But the mask made me think, "Heck, I don't care if he leaves the mask on. It's not his face that's getting me wet right now anyway." But I digress.....
The last time we had a PWK Night Out we went out to eat. This time, we decided to do something a little more active.
Shame on you for those naughty thoughts!
I'm talking about bowling, of course!
Because I like to make everything a little more interesting, I suggested a little wager. We agreed that whoever came in dead last of the four of us would have to provide the HNT photo for this week. This idea came up because Cara said she's boycotting HNT because there were no comments on last week's one and few comments on the few before that. So, we looked at Beth. No way. Daunt? He has a gift for taking a swig of beer while vigorously shaking his head no. As for me, we all know I have an inferiority complex about being compared to Cara. There was only one civilized way to settle it - assign the HNT task to the worst bowler.
We all swaggered confidently to the counter to sign up for a lane and rent those ugly and disgusting shoes.
About the shoes....First, I am convinced that they make them so ugly so no one would even consider stealing them. Second, there is something very creepy about wearing the same pair of shoes that hundreds of other people have worn before. It's a level of intimacy with perfect strangers that just isn't for me. Of course, I can write about the details of my sexual encounters and share them with thousands of strangers, but that's completely different. Third, as ugly and as creepy as the shoes are, they give you a sense of belonging when you wear them. After I put mine on, I walked proudly to pick a ball, suddenly feeling like I was part of something greater than myself. I was part of the great unwashed bowling masses. And I was proud.
Oh, I learned something I didn't know last night - that Cara has a strict sense of justice about shoe rules in a bowling alley. We noticed several people at lanes around us who were not wearing the required ugly shoes. Who did those people think they were? Didn't they understand that wearing the ugly shoes was part of the bowler bonding experience? If anyone opted out (which was against the rules), it made the rest of us just look like idiots wearing ugly shoes. The magic of the bowling shoe experience requires that everyone participate. I was able to let it go because I needed to focus on not being last, but Cara couldn't let it go. She kept talking about it. Then she walked by a few lanes giving the evil eye to the non-conformists. The she went up to the counter and reported them! But that wasn't the worst part. The worst part was that nothing happened. Nothing changed. I chalked it up as a metaphor for the injustice in modern society. Cara just got mad and focused her rage toward the pins. That was not good for the rest of us.
We bowled three games and agreed that we would add the scores from all three games to determine the overall winner, and the loser who would be our HNT guy or gal for the week.
We were having a great time, but it wasn't going well for me.
During the third game, as depression was setting in, I got a text from JJ. After an explanation of where I was and what was going on:
Kat: I suck at bowling.
JJ: You can suck my balls anytime, Baby.
JJ always knows how to help me put things into perspective.
Here are the final rankings:
First place - Cara
Second Place - DauntlessD
Third Place - Beth
Loser - Kat
Uuuggghhhhhh. I'd skip HNT this week, but I think Cara would come after me if I did.
My favorite parts of the evening: