Monday, June 20, 2011

I Love Fish Tacos...and I Can't Stop...and I Don't Want To

Let me begin by clarifying that I really am talking about fish tacos here.  Corn tortillas with fish, lettuce, tomatoes, etc. I am not using fish tacos as a euphemism for lesbian sex, so all of you boys who are out there giggling about the sexual implications of the term can focus now. There is a point for you that applies to the prowling life, but you must stay with me.

As I was saying, I love fish tacos. I live close to both the coast and the Delta region of northern California so it's the perfect place to be a fish taco lover.  In fact, I get into a rut sometimes and I can't seem to order anything but fish tacos.

Recently DauntlessD started making fun of me because we'd go out for lunch (something we like to do regularly) and no matter where we went, I'd order fish tacos.  Seafood place?  Obviously.  Mexican place? Fish tacos. California cuisine? Fish tacos. In fact, he taunted me so much about not experiencing enough variety that once we went out and I intentionally did not order fish tacos, even though I wanted to. DauntlessD's taunting is very low key, but it grates on you like steel wool on porcelain. You'll do just about anything to make it stop.  So, even though I wanted what I wanted, I opted for variety just for the sake of variety, and a little peace. You know what happened?  He ordered fish tacos! Then he ate them in front of me and talked about how good they were. It was wrong. Very wrong.

However, I digress...again.....

The point is that I found something I liked and I let someone else influence me into choosing variety instead. In reality, I love variety (if you don't know that, you haven't been reading here very long), but sometimes I also love the stability of sticking with something (or someone) I really like.

There's a concept out there in the dating and cheating world called "one-itis."  The idea is that you're not supposed to stick with just one woman (or man)  because it leads to dependence, and it sends a message that you're either easily manipulated or you're not good enough to attract multiple mates.  Those who argue against one-itis say that women are more attracted to men who are attractive to other women, and a woman will find you much more desirable if you make it clear that you have other options.

But what if you really, really like one better than the others? What if, after trying the variety, you decide that the one you have found is the one you want to keep fucking over and over again and that you don't want to spend much (or any) time with the others? Should you keep seeing others just because of the theory of one-itis? Or should you quit hunting and focus on your fish taco, er, I mean, the one you like the best?

Repeating encounters a lot with one person can mean one of two things.  Either you're on your way to digging a rut for yourself because you just don't want to expend the energy to find other partners (Gee, sounds like your marriage, huh?). Or maybe it means that you actually found something very special and you should just go with it. Enjoy it for what it is as long as you can.

I've done a lot of prowling.  I've met many men over the years.  In fact, I have met enough to know when I have a special one within my grasp, or in my bed. So why should I keep looking just so the one I have will stay aware that I am desirable to others? As long as he is behaving well, what is wrong with being content?

There is nothing wrong with being content.

I'm going to stick with the honey I have come to love as long as it works for us (which I expect to be a long time). I don't particularly care how others perceive it.

And the next time DauntlessD and I go to lunch, I don't care what he says or how much grief he gives me.  I'm going to order fish tacos....because I love them.

2 comments:

Ethan Lambert said...

I thought people like us got to where we are specifically because we don't do well with rules. If everything's going well, to hell with it. We're far beyond the point of fitting into an easily defined set of rules.

Besides, I highly doubt DauntlessD is ever going to forget that other men find you desirable ;-)

HEDONE said...

I love fish tacos too. I mean I am addicted to them. If you want I... well KinkyGent, has an awesome recipe for fish tacos. He makes them for me often and I order them out whenever they're on the menu.

And I agree, it's perfectly ok to be content. Content is not settling. Content isn't stagnation. Content is satisfaction.

Kudos to being satisfied and loving fish tacos :)

-H

P.S. Seriously if you want the fish tacos recipe email me. It is awesome!